Top Ten Ways To Say "F#$% Off"

10. "Why don't you shove it up your a$$?"

9. "What's that on your face? O nevermind it's your eyebalz!"

8. "I would say 'talk to the hand,' but I really don't want to subject any appendage of mine to your b*llshit."

7. "I swear to god if I had a blunderbuss I would use it on you, f*ckstick."

6. "If I wanted to smell d***rhea I would have slept in a Honey Bucket. Leave me alone."

5. "I swear to god I saw you on TV. O nevermind that wasn't you it was someone who is charismatic enough to be featured on broadcast television. You are not charismatic enough to even talk to for one second, let alone be on Dr. Phil or even Maury. Goodbye."

4. "My gosh! I haven't seen you since the last time I attempted to never see you again."

3. "O, thanks for asking! I really enjoy talking to you hashtag sarcasm."

2. (screaming at the top of your lungs): "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THE SILENT TREATMENT?!!"

1. "I'm tremendously sorry, sir, but I today I am unfortunately not in the mood to tolerate this pathetic excuse for "interpersonal communication." I request that you write down whatever it was that you had to say, in a language I don't understand, and mail it to an address that is different from mine by at least one digit, preferably more."